A New Chapter
I flip the switch. The small bathroom light above me flickers to life, and I meet the steady gaze of my reflection. She doesn’t look like me. She is beautiful, with loose red curls pinned carefully, framing her face, and a soft body tucked into a simple dress. Innocent. That’s how they all tell me I look.
I smile, shaking my head, and begin my nightly ritual. I take out the hairpins, letting my hair fall to my shoulders. I press my glossed lips to a tissue, and strip my eyes of all the heavy liner. I step out of the dress, and stand back. I have never thought myself beautiful, but I have always liked my look best when there is nothing helping it. No makeup, no fancy clothes, no jewelry. Just me.
If only there was someone who knew the real you. I see my lips turn up and my eyes harden. My reflection seems to be mocking me. I try to ignore the thoughts of where I just been before coming home, and my body tenses. I bring my hand to the switch again, and the grinning face disappears into the dark. I don’t need any of that tonight.
I crawl between the soft bed sheets, curling up in the warmth of my bed. I think back to earlier this evening, and shiver. It was a night I won’t likely remember, like so many others. Well maybe if you didn’t have to fake it, you might actually enjoy it. I curl up tighter. I feel tears start to come to my eyes, and I choke them back. Not tonight. I’ve gone eight days tear-free, and I want to make it to nine. I am strong. I am determined. I am a survivor.
Don’t get too high and mighty, honey. No. Don’t go there.
You’re also a prostitute.
I’m thinking of possibly starting a book here, but I’m not confident in my own work. Yes? No? Maybe?